” It was easy to direct blame on my cancer for the things I tried to hide, didn’t want to admit about myself or lacked the desire to reflect on. I no longer could run away from them. It was time to face my dark side, to embrace the side of me I tried to convince was not there or wanted to believe I was better than. Cancer has broken down the walls I have built, made me shed layers of my skin to get to the source of who I am and has made me bald to literally bare it all, to look myself in the eyes and face it. Yes cancer has made me bald but in truth we are all bald underneath our hair. We all find ways to cover up our true self, hide the pieces of who we are that are less beautiful, and find ways of protection when we are essentially causing more damage through limiting our capacity to just be. Who are we then? We are love. In all attitudes and emotions no matter how raw or dark love still exists. I have learned it’s by embracing our darkest sides and less glamorous faces we then prevent resistance. Behind resistance lies the magic. If we stop protecting ourselves and others from moments of sadness and loneliness then we can truly & deeply feel. All of who we are. If we unveil what lies underneath fear we uncover the desire to feel safe and beneath sadness is the need to heal and feel whole. This sense of wholeness is always present if we can only recognize that all the love we need is within our Self. In these moments of pain, darkness, confusion, depression, sadness, anger and fear I am still love. The trick is not to let the fear of your emotions hinder your capacity to journey to the source where ultimate healing can take place. Have the strength and courage to look deep into your soul and know that no matter what you find is exactly what it should be. Take away the judgement, be in the space of emotion, embrace it, be honest, let go of fear, have faith and remember always no matter what physical, emotional, mental state you are in: You Are Love. ”
IAMLOVE by Rachel Rotteveel
Text: Rachel Rotteveel
Photography: Hester Baks
Loving yourself is not always that easy, but that’s were it all starts
” Love starts with yourself, let us love ourselves so we can love others, let’s spread love instead of fear, together we can make this world a little better.” I AM LOVE
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